Writing: paranormal journal

"If the damned gave us a roadmap, then we'd know just where to go."   - Modest Mouse

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Here is the equation: 

H+D=G (Human plus Death equals Ghost)

H+DBVBTIV=NG (Human plus Death By Vampire Bite Turned into Vampire equals No Ghost)

V+S/S=NG (Vampire plus Sun or Stake equals No Ghost)

Can V→G?  locate S.  (Can Vampires coexist/share domain with Ghosts, find Soul)

OR
If  human Bob dies, supposedly his soul (or essence, or whatever) can create a ghost. If human Bob is killed by a vampire, and then turned into a vampire = no ghost. If vampire Bob dies a final time (or final death) = no ghost.   Where does the soul go? 
     Stories about vampires sometimes say that they are soulless, or that they have lost their soul.  Many theories exists that state that a ghost is the human soul.  So where does the vampire soul go?  Sometimes they are servants of the devil.  Sometimes just demons.  If they are demons, then there must be other types, maybe one that collects these souls in limbo?  If a standard Christian ideal is used, the devil has their soul.  But, if a "good" person dies by vampire bite, they have no soul.  How did the devil end up getting his hands on a "good" soul?  But if the human Bob dies, and creates a ghost before they become a vampire, can there be a ghost Bob and a vampire Bob at the same time?

  As I have written before, I was raised on the horror movie genre.  I grew up with monsters, mayhem, and madmen.  But in the last few years there has been a disturbing trend in horror with a sub-genre labeled “Torture-Porn”.  The phrase has been attributed to a 2006 article in New York Magazine, by film critic Davis Edelstein.  This sub-genre of Torture-porn has a focus on extended scenes of human torture, in particular (but not limited to) female torture.  Example films are: Hostel, Wolf Creek, Turistas, the Devil’s Rejects, and Captivity.  Now, I have a hard time with this subject as I grew up on another sub-genre of horror referred to as “Slasher” films (Ex. Halloween, Friday the 13^th).  These films tend to be focused on a high body count complied by an un-killable madman bent on revenge, usually with some type of physical deformity and super-strength.  Slashers are created through childhood trauma, or traumatic event, and the terror is the stalking monster- the obvious good versus evil.  Slashers also had their share of critics calling it depravity based on the teen exploitation content.  Teens were often murdered in wildly gory fashion with at least one scene being carried out in the midst of sexual activity.  So to call one sub-genre bad (and in my opinion Torture-Porn is bad), must mean there is a difference.

    The differences lie mostly in context and development of violence, and story intent.  Slashers tend to have a murder scene that has a gory-splashy-effect following an intentional anxious build up of snooping around in the dark.  Torture-Porn has extended scenes of slow-painful-cut-the-tendons agony.  The difference here lies in the reality and viewer connection.  We are removed in a Slasher film from the babysitter wandering in the dark house, the killer is an in-human monster- it is intended as a startle scene.  We expect to jump and scream, the build-up prepares us for that event.  In Torture-Porn we are drawn in to the situation, invited to watch a human suffer a slow agonizing scene of torture.  Slashers have the big money shot (ala machete to the head) for a quick death that is a part of the story.  Torture-Porn has an elongated slow burn (ala small power tools, or cut tendons/fingers/joints via knife) that becomes the story.   One has a cartoonish approach to violence, one has a voyeuristic approach.  It is here in that difference that I have my first problem with Torture-porn.  The negative criticism to the cartoonish approach is that it minimizes the violence, it negates the character and removes the humanity of the situation.  The negatives to the voyeuristic approach has us watch the pain, the suffering, the dark side of our psyche.  It does not minimize, it highlights- even parades the suffering around.  Some may say that is the point, but what point is that exactly?

     The stories of each offer the second difference.  While I admit that many poorly made films tend to skimp on story development, Slashers tend to have a story, Torture-Porn has a situation.   Slashers have (albeit generic) a good versus evil metaphor.  We are introduced to characters, we root for the good. Torture-Porn has been knocked for not introducing characters, and for having no point made by the presented situations.  Slashers have the standard madman seeking revenge, Torture-Porn merely sets a situation for the characters to be violently exploited.  They are basically well-lit snuff films to watch someone have things done to them that we’d really like to not have done to us.  While Slashers play to the giddy little boy that wants to see something gross, Torture-Porn plays to the twisted little boy that wants to do something gross.  Torture is not for the fright/startle effect, or creating monster movies in any shape or form.  I think that may be what bothers me most.  Because of the gore, they are lumped in with the Horror genre, where they are more Thriller if anything at all. 

     The criticism of Slashers was that teens would be exposed to violence that they would therefore commit.  I never believed that any unbalanced teen would be committed to an insane asylum for 15 years and come back every year on  Halloween to kill babysitters.  But I can actually believe that an unbalanced teen might want to experiment with tying up another person and torturing them for days until they died.  One is outlandish, and one is reality.   What makes it reality is that the content and violence inherent to Torture-Porn is the everyday type that taps into an unbalanced minds control/revenge fantasy.  Slashers had a case of no-way-to-get-there-from here for alienated/unbalanced/revenge-seeking types that would watch them. The Slasher mindset reasons that there is no true way to stalk and kill groups of teens on Halloween, because the viewer is not so unhinged, nor do they have super-strength...or possibly it might be an unavailability of a hockey mask.  But the Torture-Porn mindset does offer a way there as it presents the single victim held hostage and abused for the dirty little secret of sadistic control.  Torture-Porn presents the reality of serial-killing, and I find that to be yelling fire in a crowded theater.   Stephen King once commented on Torture-Porn by using an art-based reference.  “Yes, it makes you uncomfortable, but good art should make you uncomfortable.”  But with art, that uncomfortable feeling comes with an idea that challenges our current line of thinking.  There is no idea that Torture-Porn challenges, unless it is to make torture socially acceptable.  I understand the study of the evil that men do, and how understanding early warning signs, or social interventions can avoid this from happening to future unsuspecting victims, but can anyone say that this is what any of these movies has as its intention?  Of course not, it is exploitation- and that is not a horror movie.  Both types use exploitation, but there is a large difference between exploiting a fear of what goes bump in the night, and the fear (or glee) of inflicting pain upon a human being for pleasure.  Does that mean impressionable types watching a film that exploits torture will go and imitate the movie?  Probably not.  I have heard the same argument against the "evils" of comic books, cartoons, videogames, slasher films, and rock music.  Sometimes it is said that our art mirrors our reality.  If that is the case, then these movies may mirror our societies general feeling that we have lost control. 

     Here is a frightening story…

     When I was in high school (10th grade) this new kid moved into the townhouse complex that I lived in- his name was Jerry.  Jerry had the same bus stop that I did, he was a tall blond pale kid with thick glasses and a poor complexion.  Jerry was odd, and one of those characters that seemed like he was trying too hard.  Jerry made a lot of claims... he claimed he was a karate expert, he was rich, he played in a band…you know the type.  He came across as a know-it-all jerk, and quickly un-made friends.  For Halloween that year, Jerry dressed up as a ninja and spent the whole day with his hood on and not talking.  Kind of creepy, I did not really like Jerry and he knew it.  Soon after Halloween, Jerry stopped showing up at the bus stop.  A week went by, and still no Jerry.  Everyday I passed his townhouse on the way to the bus stop, and every day the shades were drawn.  In fact, the bus stop was just a few doors down from his house.  I don't think anyone paid any attention to his absence.

     I have never been the best of sleepers.  Even in high school I would stay up until the wee hours and get up at the crack of dawn.  There are numerous pictures of my teen years with me having bags under my eyes.  Late one night during Jerry's absence, I opened my eyes to Jerry leaning over me emitting some type of silent groan.  He was deformed in some way, his glasses were all cockeyed, and he was a grey-purple complexion that made his acne bright pink.  And he was still wearing his ninja robe, except it was dirty.  I froze, it freaked me out-and I quickly scrambled to turn on the light next to my bed...to nothing.  There I was at 2am with the light on breathing hard and wondering what the hell that was about.  The next morning at school everyone was a buzz- Jerry had gone out to the railroad tracks near where we lived (which I could see from my bedroom window) and hung himself from a train track utility pole.  He hung there for a week before being found by some kids riding dirtbikes, the rumor was that he was found wearing his ninja costume.  So everyday that week that we stood at the bus stop, Jerry was hanging dead about 1,000 yards away. 

   I was raised with an interest in the paranormal (monsters and ghosts), but from early on I could spot the fakes.  I developed a skeptical mind, and this was a true test.  Was this real or in my mind?

the FACTS: There was a "Jerry", he was a creepy jerk, and he did hang himself from a train track utility pole which I could actually see from my bedroom, and he was there for a week before being found.  It really was about 1,000 yards away from the bus stop, and it really was 10th grade.   Jerry did dress as a ninja and not speak for a day, and his house was just a few doors away from the bus stop.  

I did wake up and turn on my light, it was 2am and I was breathing hard- and scared.

the EDITS: The ghost of Jerry was a dream.  One of those "waking" dreams that confuses reality and a dream state, but the dream still produces very real emotions upon waking.  But how did you dream of him BEFORE you knew he was dead?  simple...I didn't.  In many conversations afterwards, the timeline slowly shifted.  The discovery of  Jerry's body occurred BEFORE my dream.  In fact, it had been the topic of school whispers all week, and likely influenced the way Jerry appeared in my dream.  Yes, his body was hanging for a week- but in remembering I combined two/three weeks into one.  My mind made the story more intriguing and scary.  With enough monster and horror movies behind me, I assumed that Jerry would be discolored and "ghostly", the walking dead were always a purple-blue.  I also had him in the ninja outfit that made him even more creepy, even though that was never proven as true. 

     The real story is the trick of the mind.  This is the way that I see a LOT of the first hand accounts of ghosts and monsters.  As humans we are so quick to explain something we do not understand using ancient myth and the paranormal.  Creaks become ghosts, shadows become monsters.  Wood grain becomes the face of a demon, losing your car keys (and swearing that they were on the counter) becomes a poltergeist.  Sometimes when I tell this story, people actually get mad that I tell them the real facts.  They want the frightening story to be real, the unknown to be based in myth and legend.  That's the way the mind is wired- to fill in blanks using what we already know and what we already believe.  This was a sad story.  Jerry's father kept all of his shades drawn for the rest of the year.  Every day I passed his townhouse with all the shades drawn.  The knowledge of what happened to Jerry, and passing this darkened house every morning must have built up to a point where it became something in my dream.  There is also the point of mental development.  As a young teen, I was at the stage of reforming stories to make them more interesting, to make more attention for myself.  Most of us get past that point of personality development, but it should always be a consideration when dealing with first hand accounts.  The mind tends to recall events in a way that makes them more exciting.  It is like the magicians trick- the memory of the trick is much better than the actual trick itself.  Memory edits out all the mundane details.  The more exciting the story becomes, the more attention we receive- the more special we become.  "See that kid?  He saw Jerry's dead ghost...He can see where Jerry hung himself...he lives near Jerry..."  For some it is better to stand out for being crazy, than to not stand out at all.

In recent days I have had 3 dreams of a zombie filled world.  I am taking this as a sure sign of the coming zombie apocalypse.  Therefore, I am taking on the responsibility of disseminating the information and theory that I have a spent a lifetime gathering in movie & book formats.

            What I know for sure:

      1.  Zombies will take over.  Every movie that I have ever clinically researched shows that we (the living) will lose.  The 2008 presidential campaign has a human candidate in Barak Obama and a recently dead zombie candidate in John McCain.  Just look at his smile, that’s one creepy smile that is all about eating you.  Obviously his platforms have little thought put into reform, policy, and social issues- they are all about eating people like you and me.  Now if we elect Obama, we know we are just stalling.  But if we elect McCain, maybe we can push through some human zoo policies to save some of us before it’s too late.

      2.  Zombies are evolving.  Back in the day it used to be all about the unsteady stumbling apathetic type that would get lucky enough to trip you up, but the zombie of today is athletic and angry.  They no longer need us to run screaming while looking back over our shoulder not seeing that tree branch that we are doomed to trip over.  If we are at all lucky, we will have a mix of the apathetic-slow and the furious-fast types.  I suggest good old fashioned football tire stepping drills to get into shape. That, or buddy up with any good NFL running backs that survive the initial zombie onslaught and ask them to carry you.  But I would steer clear of former running backs that have retired to be color commentators, as they are out of shape-or better yet maybe stick close to someone with juicy girth like an NFL offensive lineman.

      3.  Zombies tend not to answer questions.  When confronted, a sure fire way to discern zombie from a human is to ask a question that requires a decent enunciation.  Shout out pretty much any tongue twister “WHAT DOES SALLY SELL BY THE SEA SHORE?”  I think most living people know that she sells sea shells by the sea shore, and there is no way a zombie can get that out with even fair enunciation.  However, this can backfire if the person is not a zombie, but really-really drunk (thus, the stumbling), or deaf, or does not live anywhere near the sea shore.  But hey, shoot first and sort it out later.

      4.  Zombies are creatures of habit.  Which means that those undead that were alive and working in jobs at the electric/gas/water company will likely continue their jobs.  Therefore; our refrigerators, heat, and cable should still be up and running- but I do not guarantee quality programming.  We did have a preview of this zombie programming- I mean seriously... did anyone notice the nightly schedule on TNT during the 2008 writers strike?  2 hours of Family Guy every night.  WTF?  They shamelessly showed one season over and over.  It was good for me, but I bet most of you would get sick of the re-runs.

       5.  Survivors groups require variety.  Again my research has clearly shown that packs of survivors rarely have any variety in social types, and certainly no doubles.  There are the requisite jerky "i-don't need to listen-to-you" guys, slutty scantily-clad girls, rednecks, businessmen, young jocks (ask them about tire drills to be prepared ahead of time), and cheerleaders.  Occasionally there is an older married couple, a mechanic, a police officer/gang banger combo, and if you are lucky a nurse or science nerd who understands the plague when everyone else is clueless.  What does this mean for you?  If you are solidly in one of these social types, it’s best to: a) leave on your own and begin a new group,  b) claim the other social twin is a zombie and shoot them, or c) evolve into a new type of social pariah.  See…I am an artist.  Artists never survive the zombie apocalypse, so I am sure to have no worries in any group of survivors I come across.

     I want to believe.  I want there to be a magical universe filled with monsters and mystery.  The paranormal world is fascinating to me- that is until I apply logic.  I have a love of being scared, and a love of monsters.  But, I am also a skeptic- and these two frames of thought are often clashing in pop culture (and in my head).  So here are a few thoughts on the popular subjects that continue to intrigue me...

"Extraordinary claims require extraordinary proof." ...Carl Sagan

GHOSTS

    I watch the show "Ghost Hunters" (as well as a few others that are tolerable- but I am sticking to this show as my example), and I have noticed a few things.  When the show sticks to science, it is very interesting.  First the good: The theory that certain geographical/geological elements may act as a recording device is an interesting and magical notion.  Could certain types of rock and weather conditions act as a recorder?  Could certain types of strong electromagnetic fluctuations alter the way the human brain perceives things around it?  Does the brain naturally fill in the blanks of things we do not understand with what we already believe?  How do psychological issues factor into the perceived paranormal? Are "disembodied" voices speaking to us...or are we filling in the blanks to make sense of garbled natural occurring noise?  Do myth and legend effect situational perceptions?  I am much more inclined and interested to find answers within the mind and the myth- because they make sense.  And having things make sense appeals to me as a skeptic.  In my opinion, shows like this are for entertainment- not proof or science.  A one time anomaly means nothing.  It comes down to the fundamental scientific rule, if you can't reproduce the result- then you have to throw it out or set it aside.

     Then of course there are the elements to these shows that make no sense whatsoever (or "the bad)".  Much of the "scientific" use of instruments is not so scientific.  Do microphones pick up EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomenon)?  Or is that naturally occurring noise that our brain deciphers to make sense?  Why do non-English EVP's always seem to be speaking English?  How about that "Orb" photography...how does this even still matter?  A cursory knowledge of photography explains that dust, bugs and flashes are the cause of "spirit orbs", and to deny this is to hide your head under the covers.  Reflection and disorientation has been a major cause of misunderstood imagery in both thermal and infrared cameras, and then there is the charlatan aspect.  On Ghosts Hunters they occasionally have segments that appear to be faked.  It is too often the case that something happens off camera, or is confused as "paranormal".  I mean come on!  If you were the host of this show, desperate to "prove" your profession in the paranormal, and the cameraman continually missed the money shot...what would you do?  What it boils down to is: if they do not produce some type of result, there won't be a show very long- and that should always be a preliminary consideration when judging any show of this type on television.  These shows NEED the money shot, and that in turn means that there is an inconsistent approach to the skepticism and fakery that is afoot.  There is a prison episode where a cloaked black figure whirls in front of the camera.  It looks a lot like someone has just whirled a cape by the camera, but very little weight was ever given to this event- despite the hosts noting that they had no idea what it was, they just dropped it. Now, I don't think that the hosts are in on it, but I do think that the producers know the show won't last without results. 

     Multiple shows have very suspect results, the worst offender being the terrible "Paranormal State" (also see "Most Haunted" and  "Ghost Adventures").  Any show that utilizes "feelings" and mediums/psychics/demonologists (or should I call them superheroes...because that is a super power) is suspect in my book based on preconceived beliefs.  How do you prove someone "feels" something?  Can I simply have a bad day and say I'm possessed by a demon?  CRASH!  My car accident was caused by Beelzebub.  How much does a preconceived religious belief factor into a comprehension of "proof"? 

     On the fringe shows, demons and the devil are a regular occurrence.  That means there must be a precondition of belief, which does not have a place in a neutral scientific arena as it taints perception.  Every time the medium/psychic gets specific on these shows it turns out to be wrong- and that's because the trick of being a psychic is generality.  The same can be said for anyone who supposedly "speaks to the dead". How do you prove that ability?  Again, with a skeptical ear, those very specific guesses to the audience are very general.  Like a psychic stating: Today you will find someone in your life.  For those inclined to believe the super-powered psychic/medium...google a magicians term called "cold-reading", or anything by the Amazing Randi.  I have a hard time with anyone claiming to have super powers.  What's next...Gummi bears in Unicorn land?  We all want there to be more to this world than what we know as life.  But until there is a definitive proof...here we are.  And where we are is steeped in centuries of myth and religion that makes us believe that "life" is a practice for the next world.  What if this is not a try-out?  How would our lives change?

MONSTERS

     There are true mysteries in the world, it just seems as if very few care about the real research to discover them.  I regularly watch "Destination Truth".  Not for the monsters they never seem to locate, but for the humor from the host Josh Gates.  If I watched it for the "truth" or the monsters, I would be pretty frustrated.  The show goes all over the world for an hour, but they never actually get anywhere.  They tend to trick a viewer into staying by using startling cuts from later in the show that suggest monsters and mysteries uncovered (Ghost Hunters uses this same tool), but it is almost always taken out of context usually being a show member being startled by a spider or other show members.  That is the ticket for "monster" shows in the media..."what if?"  Still, I watch because the host is worth the aggravation. The good elements to these shows is again the science and the inclusion of the myth in social context.  The good shows always include how a legend can change the perception of an event.  On "MonsterQuest" (lots of "hunters" and "questers"...not a lot of finders) they had a show on monster lake eels.  One gentlemen who was a witness described driving along the lake and "He always tended to look at the water while driving because he had heard stories...", well isn't that a preconceived notion?  Why would he "watch" the water if he did not already believe in the legend?  If you already believed,  could then a large log therefore be misconstrued as a monster?  And shouldn't he be watching the road instead of the water?  It's the effect of legends and myth passed down that effect how the brain makes sense of a confusing situation.  If you have heard for your entire life that there is a lake monster at your local lake, and you see something in the water- what would you think?  Our minds are not wired for mystery, but to make sense.  We need the quick answer to sort out what is happening so we can react- that is the way that the brain works.  Perceive, sort, react, make sense. 

     The whole notion that there are thousands of legendary monsters roaming all over the world is nonsense.  Look up any part of the world, and there are thousands of lake monsters, bigfoot creatures, dragons, dinosaurs, monster man-eating worms, vampires, werewolves and such...but still no physical evidence. Obviously we are all waiting for the proof as just this past summer yet another bigfoot hoax made the national news.  Apparently 2 hunters in Georgia found a dead 700lb. bigfoot, put him in a freezer and took a picture before announcing to the world that they would hold a news conference.  They forgot to mention that they would not be bringing the body to the news conference, or that the DNA testing would  result in the DNA of a possum cadaver tossed on a costume prop.  Oops.

     The most legendary bigfoot evidence continues to be the 60's Patterson bigfoot photo and video, believers hold this as the holy grail of total proof.  So are you to tell me that there are thousands of these 7 foot creatures walking around in the wild of the US, and there is not one bit of physical evidence?  Oh...so it's just a grainy  video and plaster castings of large footprints then?  My very favorite bigfoot story came from a history channel bigfoot special.  A backwoods woman claimed that she not only saw bigfoot, but that a family of bigfeet lives near her...and borrows spices for cooking.  One day, one of the monsters knocked on her door asking (they speak English) for oregano.  When she handed the oregano to "it", she pulled out some hair for proof.  That proof looked just like hair from her cat.  In the same episode a 60 year-old Russian researcher (who travelled all the way from Russia just for this) talks to this woman, and then re-enacts how a bigfoot would kill a deer using a deer lawn ornament...sweet.  Like I said above: Gummi bears in Unicorn land.

UFO's

     This is not just a side story, but a full on cultural phenomenon.  So many people believe in UFO's and aliens that it permeates our culture.  UFO's and conspiracy theory are forever tied together.  There is a boatload of good and bad science at work in this field.  Like everyone else on the planet, I forget that I am living on a small spinning ball floating along in the universe.  My mind makes sense of it, by stating that we must not be alone...how could we be?  There has to be life out there somewhere...right?   If we were not alone, wouldn't that really change everything we now believe in religion, politics and society?  Maybe even change the way we exist and reproduce.  Most definitely it would change the current limitations we have of living on one small spinning ball.

     The good science tends to look at the science of space travel, communication and mapping strategies, but after decades we have nothing to report.  The good science also says "yes, there is life...but not as we know it."  The good science keeps an open mind, but a closed book.  The good science tends to look at geographical and atmospheric anomalies as well as human conditions of perception and deception.  oh...I should note that people do tend to fabricate for a variety of reasons.  Some want attention, some want money or fame, and some truly believe the stories they tell due to mental inefficiencies or plain old confusion.

     The bad science tends to use "recovered memories" and conspiracy theory.  Recovered memories are induced through therapeutic hypnosis, kind of like uncovering your "past life".  The problem with this is that yet again, we are assuming the brain is accurately recording or producing the outcome, except that the brain is not a machine- it is organic matter brimming with electrical impulses and delicately balanced chemicals.  The brain is an amazing human part.  With all of our technology, we are still no where near what the brain can do each and every day.  What we know about the brain today, will be completely outdated in just a year or two.  And yet, we think we are flawless recorders of events.  That our eyes do not make mistakes, that our memories are as good as gold.  What happens when one of those electrical impulses in the brain misfires?  Or the chemicals go unbalanced?  What happens if one of those memories goes bad?  Think of your computer...has it ever crashed or had errors?  Now imagine that at our current level of technology NO computer comes even close to what a human brain can do in simply deciphering visual information, not to mention all the rest that the brain has on its list.  How many of us have absolutely remembered an event that never happened?  When I get distracted by doing more than one thing at a time, I can't even clearly recall what I may have said.  The brain is the mystery, not the alien. 

     You cannot discuss UFO's without conspiracy, and that makes separating fact from fiction difficult.  However, I don't want to get into conspiracy- just how it is utilized within the frame of belief.  The Roswell incident occurred in 1947, right at the beginning of the UFO hysteria and the end of World War II.  Fears of the US being absorbed by a more powerful force were (and are still) common.  Setting aside the endless conspiratorial stories, and the endless government explanations, we have a single event that is utilized as definitive proof.  The mystery of that day is what created the conspiracy, and every single event after that just snowballed the effect.  Again, like the Patterson bigfoot- proof is in the follow up legend, not in fact produced at the event.  If a true UFO did crash, every speck is now gone...how can that be?  Not only that, how did what must be thousands of witnesses simply stay quiet all this time?  Was it a UFO, or a government balloon/high altitude test dummy/secret project?  Why was it first reported as a UFO?  It's not like the government ever makes mistakes right?  We can argue like this for pages and pages without getting anywhere.  But the real UFO theory lies in the human mind and social interactions.  The conspiracy and the legend are much more interesting than the actual event.  We all want something exciting to discuss, and like the old "telephone" group exercise- the story takes on a life of its own....suddenly the story is twice as long and now has dead aliens, military conspiracy,  and governmentally controlled black-ops.

     Let's just say that UFO's do not exist, then why are they so commonly reported?  And what about alien abductions?  The mind is an amazing universe that we have yet to understand.  What would you prefer...someone telling you that while you were asleep your brain tricked you into partial awareness, but your body remained paralyzed and that your perceptions of light and shape distorted into human like forms from shadows, and excess memory and life events are processed like a trash compactor into what you thought was a nightmarish reality?  OR That last night aliens came to your bedroom and took you aboard their ship to do anal probes?  Which is more exciting?   What would you prefer...watching all those people on tv claim to have seen something in the sky OR being on tv making the claim with them?  What would you do...If you are in a group of people staring at the night sky, and someone sees lights and shouts "UFO!", will you be the one skeptic in the group explaining star alignments and atmospheric conditions OR want to excitedly join in and yell "I see it too!"?  It's human nature to join in, we all secretly want to hold hands in Gummi bear and Unicorn land. 

     And if you ever come across a travel channel show called "Weird Travels : Alien Encounters" watch closely at the end when they show the paintings produced pre and post renaissance while the narrator details how "historical" paintings show how man has documented alien visitations for thousands of years.  That is quite a painting they have there with the alien holding the baby (see insets)...except...it's not from the renaissance.  In fact, it's mine!  The image was used for the August 2002 cover of Skeptic magazine.  They could have asked me to use it- but they didn't (yes, they ended up paying for the use).  The producers went for the shocking image that showed aliens being a historical fact through classical representation, only there are very few examples of such that are not directly related to a godly power being illustrated.  Even now it is common to assume the unknown is a god-like deity, look at how many religious references there are to 9/11 and the 2007 tsunami disaster.  From Zeus to Jesus Christ...it's easier to believe that something else is pulling the strings.  And that leaves one last series of which would you prefer belief questions...

     Would you rather believe that life is a random series of events that you yourself are responsible for with a generous mix of chance OR that there is a big-bearded man sitting on  a cloud calling the shots that make up your life until you die and either become a ghost or go to Heaven or Hell?  Do you subscribe to the chance of a tadpole like creature crawling out of a DNA soup a millennia ago OR that aliens or gods began the race of humans in order to come back in 2,000 years for various anal probes and religious conflicts?  Do you think that the advanced Egyptian race labored to build the pyramids using slaves and inventive technology and understanding of architecture OR that Aliens came down and made these random triangles in the sand for the still-too-stupid human beings?  Do you think that the world is filled with wonders OR do you think that the world is filled with mysterious and elusive monsters?  I understand that the myth allows us to accept our fates.  And I get that simplification keeps us from being overwhelmed, but all of our beliefs do not need to be so shaky- the answers can be found in our inner workings.  While the Gummi bear and Unicorn land is tempting, I prefer to use common sense- I give myself and the human race more credit through skeptical thinking, and look into my brain, myself, and my beliefs for the answers to the mysteries.

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